Self-Inflicted Verbal Lashing

Disclaimer: Due to my tendency of thinking I'm absolutely fabulous in everything that I do, I'm going to be as hard on myself as possible.

I did have a clear all-encompassing thesis, however I am unsure of how the paper is received by my peers. It bothered me that I had a hard time revealing the story as vivid as I recalled. Serial rough draft killings took place before I settled on the resulting draft. Although, I feel that my paper was strong, I realize that it is my own personal experience and that bias influences my critique.

I NEED YOUR HELP!
Yes, you reading my post. I need some input on my rough draft b/c I can use all the peer editing help that I can get. If you are interested in helping this poor soul out, please e-mail me: carlyh@bgnet....

Thanks! --C.J.

Response for Wednesday: Discourse Community

The Wikipedia entry for "discourse community" explains that the community has a set of unwritten rules that govern its discourse (which is a concept much broader than "language"). Look at the two texts you read for homework, the Borg essay (academic discourse community) and the Wikipedia entry (Wikipedia discourse community). Choose one and try to come up with 2-3 of these unwritten rules that particular discourse might have. What kind of rules might either of these discourse communities have? How do you know?

--Elizabeth

self evaluation

Self evaluation
Brandon Jones

I feel that my opinions that were on this paper are from experience, and just from my perspective. Also, the inserts that I used from the readings helped make some choosy words for this rough draft. I know that I could use some improvement but I think that I did ok.

Draft Essay #1: Dan Macon

I am coming along with my essay well. I need to find ways of shortening it up so I can have only two pages. Also I am still working on how my conclusion is going to be. I have plenty of information so I am not worried about that. I just need to work on narrowing it down.

Self-evaluation

I think that writing this first draft was a good start to remember how to write efficiently.
I feel that every time that I write though I improve so much better as I did before.
I understand that writing is a vital too for Business and Law career and so I hope that I can develop the skills I need to get the job that I want. I believe that writing should not be underestimated because it can be a vital tool in life to achieve your goals.

essayroughdraft 1

The first essay was a challenge to write. I enjoyed talking about my own style of writing and language. It was fun to tell a story from my past. I believe I wrote alright essay, but there may be some fall back sections. I am not completely and totally satisfied with my rough draft and can fortell that there will be several revisions to come.

self-evaluation

I think my paper has started off pretty strong. I am worried that my personal story is not long enough and needs more depth. I'm glad that I was able to incorporate poems from the reading unit to tie in with the paper.

Self-Evaluation of Essay 1

The first essay that we are working on in class right now is a narrative of the language rhetoric that we have used on a particular situation. My general thoughts of my essay are kind but, critical. I felt my intro was effective and the beginning paragraph set up the format for the rest of the paper. The body was at some times more focused on communication than on language rhetoric but, I felt the examples as well as situation that I chose to write about was original and informative about my language. I still believe that language and communication are very connected and I saw that in most of the essay. I will probably use a citation in the final draft and maybe change some of the content though.

Personal Narrative Rogh Draft reflection

My personal Narrative is a rough draft and I have some tweaking to do to it however some of the concepts are forming nicely. I feel like I have some randomness that I need to clear up and I need to have a stronger concise stand but all in all it's an o.k. rough start. I hope to formulate the final draft better with the feedback I recieve on the rough draft.

Personal Narrative Rough Draft

I think that my draft is progressing very well, but still needs some revision before the final copy. I would like to make my introduction more interesting by adding an anecdote about struggles between the North and South, or perhaps a quote about such differences. I also need to relate my personal narrative with the articles from class. I feel that I my work up until this point has provided a strong foundation for my paper; I will be fine-tuning my language and expanding my examples for my final draft.
Danni Boyd

Essay 1

Writing the rough draft proved to be more challenging than I thought it would be. I have a descent thesis statement which could use some revision. The points are strong, but I need to tie them in more to examples given from the readings. I tried to show the struggles that I had with another language and relate them to the readings. I hope there is a strong enough comparison.

Cassie

So far, I think I have a really good start to the essay. I like the story I chose and the way I tied my experience with dance into the “Right to My Own Language” idea. I think given more time, I will be able to expand on weak sentences and further define my thesis. I would say that organization and a stronger conclusion are my biggest concerns as of now.
-Cassie Dzienny

Self Evaluation

To be honest, I am not happy with my current draft at all. I feel as if I had ideas and concepts in my head, but I was not able to fully transfer those ideas into my draft. I feel that the more time I spend revising, the better off I will be.

Self-evaluation of draft

It took me some time to think of a good topic to write about. i am not the happiest with my draft right now, i think my draft needs a little bit more work. i had some problems coming up with some concluding ideas to my paragraphs and i want to expand a little more on the ideas i used in my body paragraphs. I like some of what i have right now but i feel as though it needs a bit more work.

self evaluation

I think that I did a pretty good job on essay number one. The reason I think I did well is because I was very creative and that was one of the main criteria for the essay. I also wrote my essay from what I truly believed to by my own personal language with Lexi and Bella. I also gave good examples and ideas of my personal language with them. Some people may think the topic I used is a little far fetched but to me its totally normal and also very original. Overall I really liked that we were aloud to use narrative and our own personal thoughts. I think I did a pretty good job on this essay and look forward to the next one.
-Michelle Chalupa

Self evaluation

Joe Mancuso
To be honest, when I first learned about this paper, I felt like I was in trouble. The paper is a very creative work and I am not the best at these types of things. Once I started writing, I noticed that it was more interesting than I thought.

My paper is in VERY rough format right now but I have plans to elaborate. I think that my ideas for the paper are strong and consume the topic for this paper. I also think my grammar and other mechanics are good. I use an story and examples throughout the text. I think that the biggest problem is lack of organization. It does not flow like it should. The body seems a little random at times. I need to elaborate and work on making more complex sentences to give the paper some sophistication. By the end of this I hope to have a free-flowing organized 3 page paper.

About My Draft

Wow,...I completed my first draft unsure about if I had grasped the concept of "my language/narration of" but after recieving feedback, I was able to focus my essay more and have a better understanding of the essay's expectations. My second draft, the one I submitted, was more focused but short and undevelped. I put great effort and thought into my paper and expect great things from it in the end but Im aware of work that needs to be done such as expansion and development.

Self-Evaluation

In a posting, evaluate where you are right now in the writing process of your first essay. Strengths, weaknesses, questions, etc.

Self Evaluation

As of now, I think that my personal narrative is pretty good. At first I thought it would be difficult to write, but when I actually sat down at the computer it was not hard at all. I think that there are some grammatical corrections that need to be made in order for my paper to be "hand-in quality."
There are a few questions that I have regarding the way the paper will be graded. On the evaluation criteria, one point focused on organization. This included a clear thesis and main points to support that idea. When I think of this format, I relate it to an argumentative essay. I wrote my paper in the from of a narrative. While it does have a main idea, there are not three main points and a clearly stated thesis statement in the beginning. Do you want the paper written more as an essay or a narrative? My paper can be changed to fit this format, but I did not do it that way because that is not how the readings that we did in class were set-up.

Thoughts after writing first draft

After writing my first draft for this class I feel that I did well in certain areas and in others I could of used a little more improvement. I was a little confused as to where to start with this draft because I knew that you wanted a personal narrative that dealt with language but I didn't know what angle I should start from. I also feel that I wrote too much, but yet I was struggling with my body of the paper. I had trouble deciding what I wanted to say when and where. I think the thing that I like most about my first draft is that it is personal because it was about something that I have dealt with all my life. Overall, I think that my first draft turned out pretty well.

Self Evaluation

I currently have two pages for my essay. I think it's a solid paper but there are things, given more time, that I would like to try and word better. I think maybe the transitions are a little weak but as a whole, I think it's a decent essay that explains my experience with the English language.